I’m claiming the first two, but the third would be a bit phenomenal even for me.

My question is: do you have to be all three (i.e. old, weak, and pregnant) to sit in these special seats? Don’t ask me; ask the thoughtful folks who designed the Chengdu airport.

Or you could ask the always efficient Thai Airline representatives who checked our luggage all the way through to Chiang Mai, Thailand even though we were stopping for the night in Bangkok.  (Different cities folks on different days…)

Or if you really wanted to test the boundaries of futility, you could ask the Thai Airlines baggage handlers in Bangkok. You know the ones; the same guys who were able to pull ONLY one of your suitcases from the Chiang Mai-bound plane, but who were unable to EVEN find the other one. (We’re sorry we are unable to find it. It is probably going to be in Chiang Mai.)

A day later (after you’ve exasperated yourself thoroughly inquiring about the whereabouts of your mystery bag) you resign yourself to just go ahead and see if the piece of luggage is indeed "waiting for you" in Chiang Mai.

Maybe you could ask the origins of the seat from the lady who mans the seldom efficient Thai Airlines Domestic Baggage Claim Desk in sunny Chiang Mai. But she won’t know where your suitcase is hiding. Oh, no. She’ll just punch in the baggage claim numbers you give her on the keyboard and tell you that the flight came in yesterday…but she also is not sure where your bag is. Don’t give up hope though! Not yet. Just keep badgering; it’s your only weapon. Pure old American nagging and whining will prevail in the end…

And then, instead of telling you who can sit in the old-weak-preggo seat, your helpful Thai Airline Rep will tell you to go check the International Arrival baggage claim area (since, obviously, the flight you never came in on the night before was an international flight…)

But don’t be surprised if there is no "Lost Luggage" department in Chiang Mai. Don’t bat an eye if the International Arrival area looks like a ghost town in the making. Don’t be surprised to see the Thai Airlines Baggage Claim office closed and locked when you arrive…

Just be astounded beyond belief…when you run with arms open wide…to the lovely vision of your "lost" suitcase…sitting innocently by the unmoving conveyor belt at Internation Arrivals…untouched…pristine…as if it has been sitting there expectantly…waiting for you its Master…for the last 24 hours.

Hey, at least someone took the courtesy to take it off the belt for you!

No worries…any thief would have herniated something trying to steal it.

I wasn’t worried one bit; although I’m still not sure I know the qualifications required to sit in those jazzy yellow seats…

Be ye old, be ye weak, be ye pregnant, sitteth thee here–by my suitcase…

(What a birthday.)

Epilogue: The hitch to this story was that we came from Xining (very cold weather) to Bangkok (very warm weather).  All of the "summer clothes" we (i.e. for Christa and I) had packed were in the missing suitcase.  It was a conundrum because I was wearing a long sleeved black T-shirt, blue jeans, and smart-wool type socks…in my new environment of 80+ degrees.  Ugh.  Christa wasn’t much better off.  To solve this problem we raided the "Lost and Found" bin at the guest house we stayed at in Bangkok.  While no shorts were available to us (dang it…) we were both able to find short-sleeved shirts to wear.  So we both arrived here in Chiang Mai today wearing someone else’s clothes (reminding me of my "thrift shop" era) and praying for a miracle…

And we got it!

Plus, today I got to eat a.) a Burger King Whopper, and b.) a delicious Canadian bacon and pineapple (real) pizza! And to think it’s only our first real day of vacation… I’m shooting to gain 25 pounds by the end.  Wish me luck…